I came to Detroit knowing very little about the city.
What I did know was love, and I rested in the understanding that love was enough to take me anywhere.
And what I braced for was that love had better sustain me, because, if you listened to the skeptics in my life, I was entering some kind of decomposing, crime-infested urban wasteland. Everyone knew better than I did (“you’re moving where?”) and fear was my only natural defense.
The first two years were difficult. It wasn’t easy when I was constantly bracing for conflict and looking over my shoulder for the violence around the corner.
Yet, rumor, speculation, and uninformed opinion were the actual violence.
My surrendering to them gave me a reason to remain disconnected and justified in my isolation/individualism.
What I eventually learned was many Detroit residents recognize their accountability to themselves and to their communities.
Detroit is so much more than I could have imagined
Detroiters transcend other people’s definitions of themselves.
Wow! I had a lot to learn [still do]. To choose to stay, even when everyone else keeps trying to define your world. Quietly working to make a new way has been the clearest example for me of what love is.
Dynamic: Detroit Black Food Security Network.
Unique: vocal artist Monica Blaire.
Committed: hip-hop artist Invincible.
Resilient: Yusef Shakur.
Proud: social activist Elena Herrada,
Transformative: Detroit Digital Justice Coalition.
And talented beyond limitation: Poet David Blair, his spirit is always with us.
Imperfect as they know they are, they still see the possibilities, and build from a place of visionary hopefulness. They can see a better future, even if no one else can. I see it too, and it helped me come to a place where it was okay to love myself, to love where I’m from (New Jersey/New York and Puerto Rico), even if it doesn’t matter to anyone else.
It isn’t always easy, and sometimes still isn’t.
Like being in a room full of people I don’t know, who aren’t particularly in love with (or even in like with!) Detroit, and the opportunity and expectation arises for me to step up and speak about what’s happening in the city, and urge others to help support and encourage change.
In those moments, when I’m uncomfortable and vulnerable – and all I really want to do is grab a drink, talk about my outfit (which is fabulous) and remain comfortably anonymous – I’m sometimes pissed off at Detroit. Pissed for inspiring me, for making me accountable, expecting me to stand in who I am, and pushing me to be truly responsible for my words and actions, in a way I’ve never had to before. It’s challenging, hard work.
In my moments of clarity I realize, what better to be responsible for and accountable to than home? And not just this Detroit home, but all my homes and families around the world.
In a way, I am just like Detroit. Imperfect, rough, inspiring, and deeply in love. And, all that is perfect!
Photo credit: jodelli